Grateful

I woke up today in the shittiest mood. Actually it was the second time I was awake this morning, as I was up *again* at 4:30 a.m. starving. I always eat peanut butter, then can't fall back asleep, then fall back asleep and just as I do, Lucia wakes up. She's so enthusiastic in the mornings, it's adorable but man, hard when you don't get enough sleep.

I slogged through the morning routine, snapped at Pete, told Lucia to stop whining instead of offering her a hug or some compassion, and spilled bacon grease (from a nearly burnt tray of bacon) all over the floor and my pants.

I'm a great sleeper. I rarely have trouble sleeping, and yet this pregnancy is throwing me as I can't seem to get enough food in my belly for baby. I'm trying super hard to make healthy choices and not stuff myself. I guess I could eat a bigger pre-bedtime snack, but it feels weird to eat more than a few spoonfuls of peanut butter right before brushing my teeth and going to bed.

On the bus today I thought about it and wondered, what am I being taught here? Where's the opportunity to be grateful? Then I realized, my baby is growing like crazy. My baby is growing! And thriving. I asked God for signs that the baby is OK. And here it is. Not in the ways I'd think of it, but signs nonetheless. So I'm choosing to be grateful.

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