Inviting It In

Some post-run/walk perspective: This month has been so stressful in terms of just demanding schedules and what-not, and I know for a fact that I got super nuts around using the O3K. The worst part is I was practically spinning off my own axis all while shouting to myself NOW DON'T GET CRAZY MKAY? DON'T GET CRAAAAAAAAZZZZY! DON'T DO IT. YOU ARE FINE.

I was telling my friend about the O3K and how stressful it was, only to hear she's been using her for 6 months. And apparently is still living and breathing on this earth, whaddyaknow. I felt ridiculous. Ridiculous.

But everyone's journey is different, and I have to respect where I am, which is nervous and emotional. And while that's totally OK, what is not OK is trying to squash that down and pretend it's just NBD over here, just making a baby. It's a big deal, and one that's incredibly charged for me. As it would be for anyone who's been through what I have. My god.

So. I told Pete that this month I'm going to embrace the crazy and just hold her hand a little tighter. I'm going to work to notice and name when I'm feeling a lot of energy and nervousness around the whole thing, and take a little better care of myself around it. I'm going to go for extra runs and walks to work through stuff, increase my vitamin B12 and magnesium, resume taking my multivitamin and fishoil, and most of all, give myself permission to FEEL this whole darn thing. Inviting those feelings in and recognizing them and respecting them.

Comments

  1. You are doing great. I never was able to do ovulation predictor kits at all- it just made me super anxious so I get where you are coming from.

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