McDreamin

I'm bored out of my gourd between projects at work, so I thought I'd tell you a story about my dream last night.

Stay with me, I know how dream stories are really annoying because they never make any sense and go on and on and on and on. But this one is really good, trust me.

So I'm reading the books right over there to the right --------------------------------> see em?

And they both talk about how its important to listen to your intuition and body and the chapter I read in the one book talks about the importance of dreams, which I read right before I fell asleep last night.


Ok, so here goes. In 1999, I was living in a suburb of Baltimore, but really wanted to move to Federal Hill, an up and coming and now shamelessly trendy neighborhood in the city. I didn't know anyone, so I posted an ad/picture in a coffee shop and said, looking for a roommate to move into a new place -- I had a lot of furniture. This chick I knew happens to be at the coffee shop one day and overhears this chick talking about the ad, and she chimes in and verifies my sanity and says that we should totally meet.

So Coryn calls me and we meet. We go out to dinner, I think she's great, we agree to find a house together. She meets Baylee. She invites me over to her current house, and tells me how great it's going to be and we're going to stay up late and drink wine and sing Indigo Girls and blah blah blah. At the time I was incredibly: 1. lonely 2. going through that terrible 20s identity crisis and 3. completely gullible.

She moves in. And basically she's never home. When she is home, she's bitching about Mrs. B barking or how thoughtless I am for putting mail on the table, when I know that upsets her. She's basically bonkers. Things deteriorate. She's never home, so I do all sorts of passive-aggressive things, like take down her shower curtain and throw it in the corner of the bathroom. Mature, yes. I felt completely taken advantage of -- I knew she had said all those things about "how we were going to be" because she was um, lying -- on whatever level.

It was when she threatened to hurt "my little dog" that I decided to end it and move out. I moved a few blocks away and tried to put it behind me. But I couldn't let go of the residual hate I had for her. She tricked me, and I never felt like such a fool in my life.

So circa 2003 I see her name on an live music calendar at MY LOCAL BAR, 30 miles away from Baltimore. Since then, I google her and still carry around this hate for her. I've tried to make it go away. I heard from a very reliable source that she's bulimic and her first marriage ended because of her infidelity. So she had some stuff going on; it wasn't just about me.

So last night I dreamt that I ran into her, and we apologized, and then had a lovely dinner together, and she was still with her first husband and he was also lovely and it was just a lovely, lovely evening. It was peaceful and lovely.

I woke up and thought, girl, you're going to make up with the parts of you that you hate. You're going to apologize to yourself for all the hatred and nastiness, and you're gonna heal.

See? I told you it was a good dream.




Comments

  1. hmm... I need to think on this. I'm a little bit trained in the art of dream interpretation....(of course)


    also meant to mention yesterday that I saw Christiane Northrup on Oprah last month maybe... and she looked so freaking good. I think the last time I saw her was in the 90s so her outfit wasn't so hot. I made a mental note: good older woman look... remember for future. Sexy old lady is good good stuff.

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  2. (of course). Truly.

    Yep, I sent this to my mom today: http://www.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200710/tows_past_20071016.jhtml?promocode=incl20071016TD

    The book is really interesting, but unfortunately written very concisely so I have to read every sentence twice, and the thing is seriously 944 pages. I'm not even through 100 pages, and I'm a fast reader.

    PS she also has a book on Mother-daughter relationships. And she is one hot older woman. Smokin!

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  3. I woke up and thought, girl, you're going to make up with the parts of you that you hate. You're going to apologize to yourself for all the hatred and nastiness, and you're gonna heal.

    I love that. Love it.

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  4. I have a slightly alternate potential interpretation:

    you are ready to take responsibility for your role in your perceived *victimization* (this relationship may symbolize that but is most likely representing a more current situation)... you know hold yourself accountable for your role in furthering/creating/enabling a negative situation that you on the surface blame someone else for.
    Make sense?

    this is what I do on Friday nights... hmm... must get a social life....

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  5. Ah interesting. I think it could be both; but the first thing I thought in the middle of the night was what I posted.

    Thanks Dream Interpreter!

    Pete just got his schedule for next weekend! So excited!!!!

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  6. I think it could be both

    often is...

    I'm about to slit my wrists (not for real... just not good either)

    let me know your schedule and when you think would be a good time for you to meet.

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